Wednesday, May 19, 2010

Bad....Bad

So it is bad that I totally forgot I had this blog. What in the world is going on in my head. I'm so confused and lost in this world. My marriage seems to be failing, my daughter is 4 going on 40, work sucks and there just doesn't seem to be any light at the end of my tunnel.

I see all these other blogs from people that blog everyday. Why can't I do that?? Do I forget? Not in the mood? What? I haven't even been keeping Kayleigh's up. I guess i shouldn't have two blogs especially when i can't keep one up. Pity party I know!!!

God I need to get my life back on track. But where to start. With me! I need to love me and me first! But I don't love me, I hate me. I hate the way I look. I want to change everything. Is that going to make everything else better, NO! But if I feel better about myself then everything else should just fall into place right???

Enough with that!!!!

Mini goals I am giving today.

1. Start walking every morning. I don't need to sleep in. I need to get up and get my day started early.

2. Quit eating out. I need to fix dinner, breakfast and lunch myself.

Let's start with those 2 first. My long term goal and I'm not sure why I'm obsessing about getting pregnant, but I want another baby. Is that possible now? NO! Will it be possible?? YES, if I do what I need to do to get my body healthy and ready to take on a baby.

So today starts my journey and my new life.